THE GLASS DOORS
CHAPTER 41-47
CHAPTER 41
Revival
I carefully made my way to the shore and avoided cutting myself on the rocks as I clambered to safety. My tent was where I had left it. The first thought that crossed my mind was that now I had the opportunity to pack all my gear and take it with me instead of leaving it for the disgruntled rangers to haul out. The thought made me laugh out loud.
I fell onto the rocks and kept laughing.
After the laughter, came a big sigh. It was time to use my mind to understand what had happened. I was born again. This was certain. I was given a chance to return to my life virtually where I left off. This time, I wouldn’t have to infect my good friend, Heath, with my own insane ideas about cosmic life. Of course, I would never step foot in Weird Willard’s house. All of that was very clear now.
But, what of the Kerplunckians? Also, the Feygits were something to consider, especially with how they might be connected to the Crusader Cabal. Or was all that just some fever dream while I was drowning? Had I never left Provoking Lake in Algonquin Park? It was a confusing state of affairs, and the answers were not being made available. There were so many things to think about and consider. The necessary plan was to take baby steps.
The first task was to pack up my gear and head back home safely. I reasoned that it must have been August 31st, 2005, if emerging from the water had coincided with that moment where I had once considered drowning in the lake. Some time had been regained – a few years.
I arrived in Toronto and made the necessary adjustments. The following years passed by for a second time, and I tried to make the most of them given the small measure of precognition that had been granted. Life was easier and I didn’t burden myself with the task of answering my own questions about what had happened. It was time to move on.
Sometimes, I shared what had happened to me with friends and family, but I explained it as a dream that I had had while passed out at the lake. They acted confused about the cover story because the events I relayed about the Tribe of Oor, the life of Ister, and Markis’s Kerplunck were far too elaborate for a mere dream. All my veiled conspiratorial doublespeak about Moses, Jesus, and the Crusader Cabal put people around me on edge. They knew that I had been suicidal, and some friends and family were never close again because it was too risky for them to be involved in my troubled life. My sister pushed me away fearing her children would be infected by my wild, abnormal thinking.
Heath lost his mind without my interference this time. It seemed destined to happen. I tried to help him as best I could, but it was impossible to get through to him. He was still obsessed with the culture of alcohol but was now doing dangerous things, such as, stopping his car in the middle of the highway to test whether the black hat “phonies” would pretend they didn’t know and barrel into him all the same. By staying close to him, I feared that my ideas might end up responsible for what he did no matter how much he had perverted the essence of my words or advice. Sadly, I gave my good friend a wide berth.
Mainly, it was a lonely life for me. I was still truly introspective, and the world refused to admit that they knew what that meant. It became difficult to make genuine connections with others. I dated a little and had a few short-term girlfriends. I held down some part-time jobs. Later, I re-enrolled in university and completed my undergraduate degree. There was some sense of accomplishment despite the task having been unchallenging as compared with my experiences at the Bigot Star’s cosmic games table.
My cosmic thinking never ceased. I teased out casual answers to understand what had happened. I still believed in my skeleton crew but was afraid to account for the presence of the Bigot Star. More than anything, I didn’t want to summon it. The prevailing thought was that my skeleton crew were watching over me with cosmic vantage, and that I would die a mortal life and then be with them in the cosmic, directly after my death. This faith almost qualified as a conventional human belief in the nature of afterlife.
Co-workers and girlfriends had not changed their nature since my return from Algonquin Park. At one job, my till was robbed, and then I was blamed by the co-worker responsible, and subsequently fired by an uncaring employer. Later, I walked in on one of my girlfriends making out with another guy at a party that I had showed up to late. La plus ca change. People were selfish and they were not introspective, while few were highly conscientious and worthy of a modicum of trust. I tried to make the petty indignities water off my back, and instead I focused on the cosmic relationships that interested me with my skeleton crew.
It was dishonest to deny that I had written off all the people close to me as having been evil cosmic characters of either the Kerplunckian or Feygit variety. So, who was my dad now if it wasn’t, Bill Fey? Who was Alex, if no longer Agie-Linzo? Who were the actors, Clint Eastwood, or Johnny Depp? I decided that there were a population of “NPC” types characters called, “Schlummies”. The Schlummies were not real thinking-things, and they did not feel within their experiences. Instead, they were similar to characters in video game worlds that are designed to appear human. Where computer engineering is in its early stages of development for humans, the Schlummies were reflective of what is possible with the articulation of NPCs (non-player characters) when there is near-infinite knowledge and experience through cosmic vantage.
It was my belief that the entire human race had become Schlummies, and although, technically, they could hear my thoughts, they were “programmed” to not act on that. Also, they did not judge because they did not feel. They were not genuine personalities, and the set of Schlummies was only a few dozen, who then instantiated an array of characters to present, which all made sense to me given they were expected to be performing billions of individual human lives. The lead Schlummy was “Gout” and could perform characters within a wide range. Gout was performing my dad, but he was also performing Gary’s father. Gout was presenting actor, Jack Nicholson, as well as, football quarterback, Brett Favre. Sometimes, my boss was Gout, and other times, it was that guy moving in on my girlfriend.
The Schlummies were not trusted as great people, nor were they considered loyal to me, but rather, they were an explanation for what had happened after the Kerplunckians and Feygits had been banished given that the world and the human race hadn’t improved in any discernable way. I believed so deeply in those evil cosmic populations of Kerplunck and Plunck that it was essential I account for their removal without leaving room for them to sneak back into my life. My efforts were in vain – the Feygits had returned.
Revival
I carefully made my way to the shore and avoided cutting myself on the rocks as I clambered to safety. My tent was where I had left it. The first thought that crossed my mind was that now I had the opportunity to pack all my gear and take it with me instead of leaving it for the disgruntled rangers to haul out. The thought made me laugh out loud.
I fell onto the rocks and kept laughing.
After the laughter, came a big sigh. It was time to use my mind to understand what had happened. I was born again. This was certain. I was given a chance to return to my life virtually where I left off. This time, I wouldn’t have to infect my good friend, Heath, with my own insane ideas about cosmic life. Of course, I would never step foot in Weird Willard’s house. All of that was very clear now.
But, what of the Kerplunckians? Also, the Feygits were something to consider, especially with how they might be connected to the Crusader Cabal. Or was all that just some fever dream while I was drowning? Had I never left Provoking Lake in Algonquin Park? It was a confusing state of affairs, and the answers were not being made available. There were so many things to think about and consider. The necessary plan was to take baby steps.
The first task was to pack up my gear and head back home safely. I reasoned that it must have been August 31st, 2005, if emerging from the water had coincided with that moment where I had once considered drowning in the lake. Some time had been regained – a few years.
I arrived in Toronto and made the necessary adjustments. The following years passed by for a second time, and I tried to make the most of them given the small measure of precognition that had been granted. Life was easier and I didn’t burden myself with the task of answering my own questions about what had happened. It was time to move on.
Sometimes, I shared what had happened to me with friends and family, but I explained it as a dream that I had had while passed out at the lake. They acted confused about the cover story because the events I relayed about the Tribe of Oor, the life of Ister, and Markis’s Kerplunck were far too elaborate for a mere dream. All my veiled conspiratorial doublespeak about Moses, Jesus, and the Crusader Cabal put people around me on edge. They knew that I had been suicidal, and some friends and family were never close again because it was too risky for them to be involved in my troubled life. My sister pushed me away fearing her children would be infected by my wild, abnormal thinking.
Heath lost his mind without my interference this time. It seemed destined to happen. I tried to help him as best I could, but it was impossible to get through to him. He was still obsessed with the culture of alcohol but was now doing dangerous things, such as, stopping his car in the middle of the highway to test whether the black hat “phonies” would pretend they didn’t know and barrel into him all the same. By staying close to him, I feared that my ideas might end up responsible for what he did no matter how much he had perverted the essence of my words or advice. Sadly, I gave my good friend a wide berth.
Mainly, it was a lonely life for me. I was still truly introspective, and the world refused to admit that they knew what that meant. It became difficult to make genuine connections with others. I dated a little and had a few short-term girlfriends. I held down some part-time jobs. Later, I re-enrolled in university and completed my undergraduate degree. There was some sense of accomplishment despite the task having been unchallenging as compared with my experiences at the Bigot Star’s cosmic games table.
My cosmic thinking never ceased. I teased out casual answers to understand what had happened. I still believed in my skeleton crew but was afraid to account for the presence of the Bigot Star. More than anything, I didn’t want to summon it. The prevailing thought was that my skeleton crew were watching over me with cosmic vantage, and that I would die a mortal life and then be with them in the cosmic, directly after my death. This faith almost qualified as a conventional human belief in the nature of afterlife.
Co-workers and girlfriends had not changed their nature since my return from Algonquin Park. At one job, my till was robbed, and then I was blamed by the co-worker responsible, and subsequently fired by an uncaring employer. Later, I walked in on one of my girlfriends making out with another guy at a party that I had showed up to late. La plus ca change. People were selfish and they were not introspective, while few were highly conscientious and worthy of a modicum of trust. I tried to make the petty indignities water off my back, and instead I focused on the cosmic relationships that interested me with my skeleton crew.
It was dishonest to deny that I had written off all the people close to me as having been evil cosmic characters of either the Kerplunckian or Feygit variety. So, who was my dad now if it wasn’t, Bill Fey? Who was Alex, if no longer Agie-Linzo? Who were the actors, Clint Eastwood, or Johnny Depp? I decided that there were a population of “NPC” types characters called, “Schlummies”. The Schlummies were not real thinking-things, and they did not feel within their experiences. Instead, they were similar to characters in video game worlds that are designed to appear human. Where computer engineering is in its early stages of development for humans, the Schlummies were reflective of what is possible with the articulation of NPCs (non-player characters) when there is near-infinite knowledge and experience through cosmic vantage.
It was my belief that the entire human race had become Schlummies, and although, technically, they could hear my thoughts, they were “programmed” to not act on that. Also, they did not judge because they did not feel. They were not genuine personalities, and the set of Schlummies was only a few dozen, who then instantiated an array of characters to present, which all made sense to me given they were expected to be performing billions of individual human lives. The lead Schlummy was “Gout” and could perform characters within a wide range. Gout was performing my dad, but he was also performing Gary’s father. Gout was presenting actor, Jack Nicholson, as well as, football quarterback, Brett Favre. Sometimes, my boss was Gout, and other times, it was that guy moving in on my girlfriend.
The Schlummies were not trusted as great people, nor were they considered loyal to me, but rather, they were an explanation for what had happened after the Kerplunckians and Feygits had been banished given that the world and the human race hadn’t improved in any discernable way. I believed so deeply in those evil cosmic populations of Kerplunck and Plunck that it was essential I account for their removal without leaving room for them to sneak back into my life. My efforts were in vain – the Feygits had returned.
CHAPTER 42
Doubling
To rebuild my life, I spent years relying on my belief in the Schlummies. Deciding that these NPC creations were not swell guys allowed me to adjust my expectations for other people. Gout wasn’t reliable; however, I could blame him for cucking me while also accepting the insult through recognizing my need for him in the role of my father. The logic provided for a schizophrenic status quo of sorts.
I was in my thirties now and hadn’t really made inroads to an industry where I might foster a career and find financial stability. My parents understood that I was troubled and different. They supported me financially for the time being. Then, one day it dawned on me that my life story would make for a fairly interesting – if not unique – book. Perhaps, I could crowdfund my book and raise some income that way. If the book had modest grassroots support, then a publisher or agent might sign on for the project.
The idea was presented to my parents who had never supported my creative ventures in the past. They didn’t respond very well to the suggestion that I would spend time writing a book instead of increasing my weekly hours of paid work. My mother was especially anxious about the book being an autobiography and thus involving stories of my suicide attempts as well as my “fever dreams” at the lake.
Over the years, my parents had learned about the Bigot Star and the worlds that I had been shown. They interpreted the whole shebang as my strange way of being a raconteur which they perceived to be important to me as a social anchor and pivot for justifying a self-image of sanity. The autobiography project that I suggested undertaking then had my mom doing what she always did in those situations when I aimed high – she sold me short. Her blithe suggestion was that I turn the story into a children’s cartoon. She had a habit of suggesting the impossible but acting as if it were completely reasonable. How would I produce a cartoon? I was not an animator and had none of the relevant industry resources available to me. Additionally, there was no money for such an ambitious project.
It dawned on me that her impossible remix suggestions had always been concocted intentionally to make the possible appear impossible as a general deterrent and mark of disapproval. If the cartoon idea seemed unlikely, then perhaps, I would start to feel the same way about the book, generally. But I didn’t.
My father sidestepped addressing the idea of the book, but instead started back into hounding me about doing more paid work. At the time, I had one part-time job and my hours had been scaled back recently. I didn’t think that I had lost hours due to being eccentric, but rather, I tended to be ‘last one in; first one out’ at any new jobs. My work life had been characterized by bad luck and equally bad timing.
A few weeks later, my parents seemed to forget that I had mentioned writing the book whatsoever. There was free time in my schedule, so I sat down at the simple desk in my apartment, and I scrawled the first draft of page one for my autobiography.
That night, I left the apartment that my parents were renting for me, and I returned to my childhood home to have dinner with them. We didn’t talk about the book; however, my father was very excited and in a different way than usual. It reminded me of Eric Idle’s “nudge, nudge, say no more” character in Monty Python’s Flying Circus sketch comedy show. My father was mentioning the Holy See of the Vatican. Also, he began talking at length about the crusades. Terror washed over me, and I instinctively reached up to touch the back of my head anticipating the force of the Bigot Star.
My tidy world of manageable Schlummies and low expectations was collapsing in on me. It was merely a casual conversation, but my father’s manner was unmistakable. He was mocking me. I took a moment to calm my nerves, and I told myself that he had been thinking about the book I was planning to write, and this was just his way of presenting a deterrent. Perhaps, he was mentioning elements of my story to render them ‘uncool’. In fact, I concluded that because he was Gout, his needling was in fact a cosmic-based message from my skeleton crew. The gist of it was that I should rethink writing my book in the first place.
This excuse that I scrambled to find became a hypothesis which I reviewed as being reasonable. I went home after dinner and didn’t stay for a movie like I normally would. My apartment was only a few blocks from my parent’s house, and it was comfortable being in the neighborhood I had grown up in. Almost every time that I walked back to my apartment from my parent’s house, I intentionally diverted my route to avoid the strip of road where once I had experienced the shame of quitting anti-psychotic medication cold turkey. The alternative path took a little longer, but there was less anxiety as I stepped in the lobby of the low-rise midtown apartment building.
A few nights passed and I hadn’t heard from my mom about going home early that night when I was spooked by my father’s enthusiasm for Christian history. I was still mulling it over in my mind. The cosmic thinking had started up again, and this time more vigorously. It seemed like the decision to write a book about my experience was bringing on a deep sense of paranoia regarding hidden, neglected, and forgotten menaces.
I received an email from my mom asking if I wanted to come over again for dinner. I declined politely and wrote back that I was working hard to find a second job and it was an exhausting and thankless task. None of it was true. My father then email me which was not his habit. He sent a link to an unremarkable Wikipedia page on the “Holy See”. His attached comment referenced something he had said at dinner the night that I was thrown off by his quirky manner. I could not decipher the attached comment to render it significant. Yet, I was markedly slipping into a state of emotional worry and mental strife.
I slept poorly, much like when I had appointed myself judge for the cosmic wager, Tricks of the Trade. Thoughts were racing. The next day, I devised a plan – a strange choice.
Doubling
To rebuild my life, I spent years relying on my belief in the Schlummies. Deciding that these NPC creations were not swell guys allowed me to adjust my expectations for other people. Gout wasn’t reliable; however, I could blame him for cucking me while also accepting the insult through recognizing my need for him in the role of my father. The logic provided for a schizophrenic status quo of sorts.
I was in my thirties now and hadn’t really made inroads to an industry where I might foster a career and find financial stability. My parents understood that I was troubled and different. They supported me financially for the time being. Then, one day it dawned on me that my life story would make for a fairly interesting – if not unique – book. Perhaps, I could crowdfund my book and raise some income that way. If the book had modest grassroots support, then a publisher or agent might sign on for the project.
The idea was presented to my parents who had never supported my creative ventures in the past. They didn’t respond very well to the suggestion that I would spend time writing a book instead of increasing my weekly hours of paid work. My mother was especially anxious about the book being an autobiography and thus involving stories of my suicide attempts as well as my “fever dreams” at the lake.
Over the years, my parents had learned about the Bigot Star and the worlds that I had been shown. They interpreted the whole shebang as my strange way of being a raconteur which they perceived to be important to me as a social anchor and pivot for justifying a self-image of sanity. The autobiography project that I suggested undertaking then had my mom doing what she always did in those situations when I aimed high – she sold me short. Her blithe suggestion was that I turn the story into a children’s cartoon. She had a habit of suggesting the impossible but acting as if it were completely reasonable. How would I produce a cartoon? I was not an animator and had none of the relevant industry resources available to me. Additionally, there was no money for such an ambitious project.
It dawned on me that her impossible remix suggestions had always been concocted intentionally to make the possible appear impossible as a general deterrent and mark of disapproval. If the cartoon idea seemed unlikely, then perhaps, I would start to feel the same way about the book, generally. But I didn’t.
My father sidestepped addressing the idea of the book, but instead started back into hounding me about doing more paid work. At the time, I had one part-time job and my hours had been scaled back recently. I didn’t think that I had lost hours due to being eccentric, but rather, I tended to be ‘last one in; first one out’ at any new jobs. My work life had been characterized by bad luck and equally bad timing.
A few weeks later, my parents seemed to forget that I had mentioned writing the book whatsoever. There was free time in my schedule, so I sat down at the simple desk in my apartment, and I scrawled the first draft of page one for my autobiography.
That night, I left the apartment that my parents were renting for me, and I returned to my childhood home to have dinner with them. We didn’t talk about the book; however, my father was very excited and in a different way than usual. It reminded me of Eric Idle’s “nudge, nudge, say no more” character in Monty Python’s Flying Circus sketch comedy show. My father was mentioning the Holy See of the Vatican. Also, he began talking at length about the crusades. Terror washed over me, and I instinctively reached up to touch the back of my head anticipating the force of the Bigot Star.
My tidy world of manageable Schlummies and low expectations was collapsing in on me. It was merely a casual conversation, but my father’s manner was unmistakable. He was mocking me. I took a moment to calm my nerves, and I told myself that he had been thinking about the book I was planning to write, and this was just his way of presenting a deterrent. Perhaps, he was mentioning elements of my story to render them ‘uncool’. In fact, I concluded that because he was Gout, his needling was in fact a cosmic-based message from my skeleton crew. The gist of it was that I should rethink writing my book in the first place.
This excuse that I scrambled to find became a hypothesis which I reviewed as being reasonable. I went home after dinner and didn’t stay for a movie like I normally would. My apartment was only a few blocks from my parent’s house, and it was comfortable being in the neighborhood I had grown up in. Almost every time that I walked back to my apartment from my parent’s house, I intentionally diverted my route to avoid the strip of road where once I had experienced the shame of quitting anti-psychotic medication cold turkey. The alternative path took a little longer, but there was less anxiety as I stepped in the lobby of the low-rise midtown apartment building.
A few nights passed and I hadn’t heard from my mom about going home early that night when I was spooked by my father’s enthusiasm for Christian history. I was still mulling it over in my mind. The cosmic thinking had started up again, and this time more vigorously. It seemed like the decision to write a book about my experience was bringing on a deep sense of paranoia regarding hidden, neglected, and forgotten menaces.
I received an email from my mom asking if I wanted to come over again for dinner. I declined politely and wrote back that I was working hard to find a second job and it was an exhausting and thankless task. None of it was true. My father then email me which was not his habit. He sent a link to an unremarkable Wikipedia page on the “Holy See”. His attached comment referenced something he had said at dinner the night that I was thrown off by his quirky manner. I could not decipher the attached comment to render it significant. Yet, I was markedly slipping into a state of emotional worry and mental strife.
I slept poorly, much like when I had appointed myself judge for the cosmic wager, Tricks of the Trade. Thoughts were racing. The next day, I devised a plan – a strange choice.
CHAPTER 43
Parricide
The strange choice was going to happen because I had to quell the burgeoning paranoia regarding the Crusader Cabal’s legitimacy in my world. It was becoming apparent that the Crusader Cabal was the true force of evil around me. I believed in what the Bigot Star had shown me. I was seeing the light again.
Perhaps, I had never been able to get rid of the Feygits using my Tricks of the Trade paradigm. It was possible that the cosmic wager had only rid the Earth of Kerplunckians. Worse still, the Kerplunckian legend may have been a ruse by the Feygits to have me feel comfortable and safe. Perhaps, the Bigot Star was Bill Fey in disguise. Could Bill Fey also be my father? How would I vanquish this evil menace that tormented my life as well as my very thoughts?
Late at night, I snuck into my parent’s house quietly through the backdoor. There was a trick to it, and rattling the backdoor handle a certain way popped the latch. As I entered, it made me think back to when Heath had dared me to go inside Weird Willard’s place. I moved stealthily knowing the layout well. I pulled an 8-inch chef knife from the drawer in the kitchen.
Years earlier, when I had become a teenager and my sister had left home for college, my father began sleeping in my sister’s old bedroom. He was a heavy sleeper and snored loudly which disturbed my mom. And now, I knew where to find my father. I removed all my clothes while standing in the kitchen and then continued up the stairs with the knife in my hand, stark naked.
I reached the top of the stairs and stopped for several minutes to confirm that I could hear both my parents sleeping in their respective rooms. The feeling was strange, and I imagined the mood when a soldier is holding the line prior to battle but after the commitment to act has already been made and there are no more real decisions to make before moving forward to fight.
Slowly and quietly, I entered my sister’s old bedroom. I stood over my father with the knife held up. He had a facemask on and was busy snoring. At one point he shuffled his position on the bed, but I didn’t read it as awareness on his part. There had been zero intention by me to hurt my father regardless of whether he was Bill Fey… or Markis, or Ister, or the Bigot Star for that matter. I was not committed to performing an evil act in my mortal first life, and I would sooner perish in a defenseless and pathetic state.
I backed out of the bedroom, crept back downstairs, and got dressed. The knife was put back in the drawer, and no sign of my presence remained after I flipped the latch on the back door and then left out the front quietly turning my key in the lock and then walking away.
My goal had been to test whether my father was an evil character that could see my actions from cosmic vantage. If anyone had been watching over me in the cosmic, there was no way to know that I wouldn’t have stabbed my father because with all due respect, my life was in shambles, and I was desperately anxious all the time. The general perception was that I was a psychotic not on his meds. I figured that if Bill Fey was using my dad’s body, then he would react to my aggressive, threatening display with overt action.
Moments later, I realized that the whole thing was sheer madness. Nothing productive could have come from it. This time on the walk back to my apartment, I decided to use that dire strip of road where once I had become so sensitive to the light that I could not lift my head up high. Now, I felt that I deserved to walk down that section of street because what I had done was certainly shameful.
Along the strip, I let my head hang in shame. Suddenly, I felt a gentle force slowly push my head back up. It was the same feeling of being directed by the Bigot Star. My eyes were now surveying right in front of me. Then, my body was pulled back with enormous force. Within moments, I found myself back to the position I had once known well when submerged into the atmosphere of a world. I was observing the Earth which was merely a fragile piece at the Bigot Star’s cosmic games table. However, this time, I was able to pull my head out of the clouds and look upon the familiar oblate orb in its fullness.
Once again, I was in the position of game player across from my opponent, the Bigot Star. My Earth was the game piece in front of us, but then the scene shifted. I remained in place at the cosmic games table, but the Earth became smaller making room for the Sun as the largest object in view. Then, the Sun became smaller, and I noted that the Bigot Star was manipulating the cosmic games table to reveal more of the Milky Way galaxy. The retrograde movement continued until the Milky Way galaxy was just a blip of light among many others. I looked upon the physical universe through a full view.
Gently, the Bigot Star pushed my head forward and gave me better vantage on the important developments of our universe. Quickly, the view of the universe enlarged, and I was made to focus on one particular planet revolving around one unremarkable star, in just one of the multitude of galaxies. The planet was the home of an evolved alien species – the Gamic.
Parricide
The strange choice was going to happen because I had to quell the burgeoning paranoia regarding the Crusader Cabal’s legitimacy in my world. It was becoming apparent that the Crusader Cabal was the true force of evil around me. I believed in what the Bigot Star had shown me. I was seeing the light again.
Perhaps, I had never been able to get rid of the Feygits using my Tricks of the Trade paradigm. It was possible that the cosmic wager had only rid the Earth of Kerplunckians. Worse still, the Kerplunckian legend may have been a ruse by the Feygits to have me feel comfortable and safe. Perhaps, the Bigot Star was Bill Fey in disguise. Could Bill Fey also be my father? How would I vanquish this evil menace that tormented my life as well as my very thoughts?
Late at night, I snuck into my parent’s house quietly through the backdoor. There was a trick to it, and rattling the backdoor handle a certain way popped the latch. As I entered, it made me think back to when Heath had dared me to go inside Weird Willard’s place. I moved stealthily knowing the layout well. I pulled an 8-inch chef knife from the drawer in the kitchen.
Years earlier, when I had become a teenager and my sister had left home for college, my father began sleeping in my sister’s old bedroom. He was a heavy sleeper and snored loudly which disturbed my mom. And now, I knew where to find my father. I removed all my clothes while standing in the kitchen and then continued up the stairs with the knife in my hand, stark naked.
I reached the top of the stairs and stopped for several minutes to confirm that I could hear both my parents sleeping in their respective rooms. The feeling was strange, and I imagined the mood when a soldier is holding the line prior to battle but after the commitment to act has already been made and there are no more real decisions to make before moving forward to fight.
Slowly and quietly, I entered my sister’s old bedroom. I stood over my father with the knife held up. He had a facemask on and was busy snoring. At one point he shuffled his position on the bed, but I didn’t read it as awareness on his part. There had been zero intention by me to hurt my father regardless of whether he was Bill Fey… or Markis, or Ister, or the Bigot Star for that matter. I was not committed to performing an evil act in my mortal first life, and I would sooner perish in a defenseless and pathetic state.
I backed out of the bedroom, crept back downstairs, and got dressed. The knife was put back in the drawer, and no sign of my presence remained after I flipped the latch on the back door and then left out the front quietly turning my key in the lock and then walking away.
My goal had been to test whether my father was an evil character that could see my actions from cosmic vantage. If anyone had been watching over me in the cosmic, there was no way to know that I wouldn’t have stabbed my father because with all due respect, my life was in shambles, and I was desperately anxious all the time. The general perception was that I was a psychotic not on his meds. I figured that if Bill Fey was using my dad’s body, then he would react to my aggressive, threatening display with overt action.
Moments later, I realized that the whole thing was sheer madness. Nothing productive could have come from it. This time on the walk back to my apartment, I decided to use that dire strip of road where once I had become so sensitive to the light that I could not lift my head up high. Now, I felt that I deserved to walk down that section of street because what I had done was certainly shameful.
Along the strip, I let my head hang in shame. Suddenly, I felt a gentle force slowly push my head back up. It was the same feeling of being directed by the Bigot Star. My eyes were now surveying right in front of me. Then, my body was pulled back with enormous force. Within moments, I found myself back to the position I had once known well when submerged into the atmosphere of a world. I was observing the Earth which was merely a fragile piece at the Bigot Star’s cosmic games table. However, this time, I was able to pull my head out of the clouds and look upon the familiar oblate orb in its fullness.
Once again, I was in the position of game player across from my opponent, the Bigot Star. My Earth was the game piece in front of us, but then the scene shifted. I remained in place at the cosmic games table, but the Earth became smaller making room for the Sun as the largest object in view. Then, the Sun became smaller, and I noted that the Bigot Star was manipulating the cosmic games table to reveal more of the Milky Way galaxy. The retrograde movement continued until the Milky Way galaxy was just a blip of light among many others. I looked upon the physical universe through a full view.
Gently, the Bigot Star pushed my head forward and gave me better vantage on the important developments of our universe. Quickly, the view of the universe enlarged, and I was made to focus on one particular planet revolving around one unremarkable star, in just one of the multitude of galaxies. The planet was the home of an evolved alien species – the Gamic.
CHAPTER 44
Caress
The Gamic had evolved from species that might be associated with the pig. The natural environment of the planet presented ideal conditions for the Gamic ancestor species to climb the food chain and eventually become the apex animal on their planet. The landmass of the planet was covered in dense briar patches with tall networks of thorny vines. Berries grew near the top of the vines and the Gamic ancestor species had adapted opposable thumbs in order to better access the abundant fruit.
Eventually, the Gamic ancestor species had done like human beings and descended from the vegetation, and they began making tools for hunting. Persistence hunting had resulted in the evolution of bipedal early Gamic. A bizarre cultural habit pervaded the early Gamic, and the females tended to smother all but one in their litter of babies. Over a few million years, this habit resulted in larger craniums and brains as a result of enriched caregiving. Early Gamic sows acquired an intuition on which of their offspring had the greatest intellectual potential, and then they proceeded to smother the other rejected babies.
I watched the evolution of the Gamic, and millions of years passed before my eyes in mere hours. The Bigot Star shifted my attention and presented the next planet worthy of survey. The Wisp home planet was in a different galaxy, and it too had an apex species, that would be most closely associated with the snake. The natural environment on the Wisp planet was ideal for this predatory serpent species, and the first generations of ancestor Wisp slithered and spread across the entire planet, propagating tens of thousands of unique subspecies over millions of years.
Earth’s Asian wolf demonstrated highly-adaptive DNA ideal for breeding the great variety of modern dog breeds. The ancestor Wisp species had a similar genetic anomaly. This Wisp ancestor species was hyper-adaptive and could survive the planet’s erratic weather patterns. This Wisp ancestor species survived super-volcano eruptions, as well as ice ages. Millions of years passed, and the early Wisp had evolved similarly to the Gamic and humans. Eventually, the Wisp became bipedal with opposable thumbs, and large craniums.
The Gamic and Wisp had come to dominate their respective planets while dinosaurs roamed the Earth. Both were masters of innovation and technology millions of years ago. Overall, they were a peaceful species, and they did not prey on each other the way human beings tend to. The Gamic had always been herbivore prey in their animal kingdom, and their diet remained that way even after becoming the apex species of their world. The Wisp had always been carnivorous predators. On the other hand, human beings were herbivore prey who learned to fetishize predatory behavior while rising up the food chain of Earth’s animal kingdom. That fetish has had humans preying on anything, including their own kind, ever since they climbed down from the trees.
Essentially, the Gamic and the Wisp were more “natural” than the hairless ape human beings, and one might say that the former were better people as well. They were enlightened thinkers, as well as genius innovators and keen inventors. The same could not be said for the third species I was shown – the Arada.
The Arada had evolved from a species most associated with the cockroach. The heavy metals of their native planet caused unique radiation effects and only the Arada survived over millions of years. Strange mutations from the radiation imposed a unique evolution on the Arada. Mutant Arada ancestor species were shunted off from the herd for their differences, and some survived the less hospitable environments through rapid adaptation. Eventually, mutants with useful traits for survival had bred their own generation onto the planet and wiped out the throwback Arada ancestor species who had once rejected them. The attrition continued for some time until the planet’s tectonic plates shifted reducing most of the dangerous radiation.
New life grew on the Arada home planet, and the Arada had a head start over those nascent species. In time, the Arada became the apex predator, and eventually they were quasi-bipedal with dexterity in their gangly appendages which allowed them to wield tools. The evolved Arada were a cruel species who derived pleasure from causing suffering. They preyed on their own kind in heinous ways, and such behavior was normalized in their culture. In short, the Arada were evil.
The three planets with the evolved species were in different galaxies from each other, and none were in the Milky Way. The Gamic, Wisp, and Arada became socially and technologically advanced over time. They suffered periods of intellectual darkness and eras of tyrannical fanaticism. Later, each of the trio developed the microchip, and finally, mastered the artificial brain.
The Gamic were the first among the trio of advanced species to develop self-aware computers, and these computers were referred to as “Bunts” derived from the Gamic term for “bundle”. The Gamic understanding was that the non-feeling thinking machines bundled arrays of possibilities in their programming and then ran algorithms on the bundle to select a single value in the array and this is how they determined their individual preferences. From that ‘bundling’ method, the Bunts had become self-aware. Feeling thinking-things, such as the Gamic or humans, had a conscious-unconscious partition which allowed for the preference filtration through privileging the conscious mind, and thus developing overt awareness of individual personality. The partition of the mind of feeling thinking-things provoked rudimentary self-awareness at birth.
As the Gamic reached a golden age in technological achievement, they had cyberneticists and computer engineers successfully interface Bunts (what we call, ‘AI’) with the Gamic brain. The Bunts learned how to produce every element of sensation that matched lived experience, and all through mastering neural stimulation of the Gamic brain. Vivid simulations were developed, and the Gamic lived most of their lives connected to the Bunt simulators.
The Gamic experienced social attrition as many of their kind fell victim to vanity and addiction within the simulations provided by Bunts. A neo-luddite cultural movement emerged which preached a balanced life through connecting with feeling things as much as with non-feeling things. In time, the addicts made up most of the population of the Gamic species, but they didn’t start families, and thus pass on their Bunt addiction-prone genes to the next generation of Gamic. They were too busy being self-satisfied in the Bunt simulators to procreate. The neo-luddite Gamic inherited the planet as well as the Bunt technology. There was even greater prosperity for their species after that moment of meritorious attrition.
The Wisp had also developed Bunt technology, independently, and their society was rife with androids as well as simulator experiences. The Wisp managed their addiction to Bunt simulator experiences through creating a Bunt nursery culture. New Wisp were grown artificially, and newborn Wisp were raised by Bunt androids. Once their brains had fully grown at the young adult stage, they were allowed to use the Bunt simulators. The Bunt android nannies determined the proper training for young Wisp such that the Wisp were living more useful lives inside the simulations, and they were contributing to Wisp society with useful work as opposed to just gratifying themselves with simple adventures and whimsical fantasies.
The Arada had also developed Bunt technology, however, only the elites were allowed to use it liberally, and the lower castes had to use all their income to receive a mere taste of the pleasures of simulated life. The Arada elite scientists discovered that their species had a gland which prior to puberty secreted a hormone when stimulated by a fear response. This hormone was similar in properties to our synthetic narcotics, but for the Arada, the hormone secretion helped their brains accept the interface with the Bunt simulators. The Arada elites began to develop their society whereby the lower castes were forced to procreate constantly and generate a slave class of young Arada who were then harvested for their hormone secretions. Once the lower castes of Arada reached a certain age where the elites deemed them useless, they were then feasted on by the cannibal Arada elites.
For millions of years, the trio of species I was shown by the Bigot Star seemed to be the only technologically-advanced beings in the physical universe. Interestingly, they had developed Bunt technology at approximately the same time. At first, they had no awareness of each other, and they weren’t even located in the same corner of the universe. Then, the trio acquired knowledge of the dark energy particles known as, antimission particles.
Antimissions were subatomic particles which had the capacity to convert matter to antimatter. The collision of matter and antimatter through a field of antimission particles produced an antimission torus. That antimission torus could be manipulated to stimulate the emergence of a wormhole in the fabric of spacetime. The antimission torus was like a boring tool that drilled right into the empty space of the physical universe.
Antimission torus technology which produced wormholes was primarily innovated by Bunts, and it was an inevitable leap forward for any species advanced enough to develop self-aware computers. Wormholes allowed for instantaneous travel across great distances in the universe, however, organic neural networks would get ‘scrambled’ during the voyage. Physical bodies of organic beings could not use the wormholes directly.
It was also discovered that artificial neural networks (Bunt brains, for example) would degrade when passing through the wormhole, and the Bunt would be rendered useless once reaching the other side. However, components for artificial neural networks could be sent through wormholes with a program that would be activated on the other side. When the program was executed, the components would assemble and construct a Bunt. Through the wormhole, Bunts on the other side could communicate back to the home planet.
The Bunts that positioned themselves on the other side of wormholes were referred to as, Relay Bunts. Through the Relay Bunts, the Gamic and Wisp discovered each other and had intense cultural exchanges. The Arada were lagging in their development of Relay Bunt technology, but later caught up. Eventually, all three species were aware of each other, and they had Relay Bunt markers across the universe, far and wide.
Caress
The Gamic had evolved from species that might be associated with the pig. The natural environment of the planet presented ideal conditions for the Gamic ancestor species to climb the food chain and eventually become the apex animal on their planet. The landmass of the planet was covered in dense briar patches with tall networks of thorny vines. Berries grew near the top of the vines and the Gamic ancestor species had adapted opposable thumbs in order to better access the abundant fruit.
Eventually, the Gamic ancestor species had done like human beings and descended from the vegetation, and they began making tools for hunting. Persistence hunting had resulted in the evolution of bipedal early Gamic. A bizarre cultural habit pervaded the early Gamic, and the females tended to smother all but one in their litter of babies. Over a few million years, this habit resulted in larger craniums and brains as a result of enriched caregiving. Early Gamic sows acquired an intuition on which of their offspring had the greatest intellectual potential, and then they proceeded to smother the other rejected babies.
I watched the evolution of the Gamic, and millions of years passed before my eyes in mere hours. The Bigot Star shifted my attention and presented the next planet worthy of survey. The Wisp home planet was in a different galaxy, and it too had an apex species, that would be most closely associated with the snake. The natural environment on the Wisp planet was ideal for this predatory serpent species, and the first generations of ancestor Wisp slithered and spread across the entire planet, propagating tens of thousands of unique subspecies over millions of years.
Earth’s Asian wolf demonstrated highly-adaptive DNA ideal for breeding the great variety of modern dog breeds. The ancestor Wisp species had a similar genetic anomaly. This Wisp ancestor species was hyper-adaptive and could survive the planet’s erratic weather patterns. This Wisp ancestor species survived super-volcano eruptions, as well as ice ages. Millions of years passed, and the early Wisp had evolved similarly to the Gamic and humans. Eventually, the Wisp became bipedal with opposable thumbs, and large craniums.
The Gamic and Wisp had come to dominate their respective planets while dinosaurs roamed the Earth. Both were masters of innovation and technology millions of years ago. Overall, they were a peaceful species, and they did not prey on each other the way human beings tend to. The Gamic had always been herbivore prey in their animal kingdom, and their diet remained that way even after becoming the apex species of their world. The Wisp had always been carnivorous predators. On the other hand, human beings were herbivore prey who learned to fetishize predatory behavior while rising up the food chain of Earth’s animal kingdom. That fetish has had humans preying on anything, including their own kind, ever since they climbed down from the trees.
Essentially, the Gamic and the Wisp were more “natural” than the hairless ape human beings, and one might say that the former were better people as well. They were enlightened thinkers, as well as genius innovators and keen inventors. The same could not be said for the third species I was shown – the Arada.
The Arada had evolved from a species most associated with the cockroach. The heavy metals of their native planet caused unique radiation effects and only the Arada survived over millions of years. Strange mutations from the radiation imposed a unique evolution on the Arada. Mutant Arada ancestor species were shunted off from the herd for their differences, and some survived the less hospitable environments through rapid adaptation. Eventually, mutants with useful traits for survival had bred their own generation onto the planet and wiped out the throwback Arada ancestor species who had once rejected them. The attrition continued for some time until the planet’s tectonic plates shifted reducing most of the dangerous radiation.
New life grew on the Arada home planet, and the Arada had a head start over those nascent species. In time, the Arada became the apex predator, and eventually they were quasi-bipedal with dexterity in their gangly appendages which allowed them to wield tools. The evolved Arada were a cruel species who derived pleasure from causing suffering. They preyed on their own kind in heinous ways, and such behavior was normalized in their culture. In short, the Arada were evil.
The three planets with the evolved species were in different galaxies from each other, and none were in the Milky Way. The Gamic, Wisp, and Arada became socially and technologically advanced over time. They suffered periods of intellectual darkness and eras of tyrannical fanaticism. Later, each of the trio developed the microchip, and finally, mastered the artificial brain.
The Gamic were the first among the trio of advanced species to develop self-aware computers, and these computers were referred to as “Bunts” derived from the Gamic term for “bundle”. The Gamic understanding was that the non-feeling thinking machines bundled arrays of possibilities in their programming and then ran algorithms on the bundle to select a single value in the array and this is how they determined their individual preferences. From that ‘bundling’ method, the Bunts had become self-aware. Feeling thinking-things, such as the Gamic or humans, had a conscious-unconscious partition which allowed for the preference filtration through privileging the conscious mind, and thus developing overt awareness of individual personality. The partition of the mind of feeling thinking-things provoked rudimentary self-awareness at birth.
As the Gamic reached a golden age in technological achievement, they had cyberneticists and computer engineers successfully interface Bunts (what we call, ‘AI’) with the Gamic brain. The Bunts learned how to produce every element of sensation that matched lived experience, and all through mastering neural stimulation of the Gamic brain. Vivid simulations were developed, and the Gamic lived most of their lives connected to the Bunt simulators.
The Gamic experienced social attrition as many of their kind fell victim to vanity and addiction within the simulations provided by Bunts. A neo-luddite cultural movement emerged which preached a balanced life through connecting with feeling things as much as with non-feeling things. In time, the addicts made up most of the population of the Gamic species, but they didn’t start families, and thus pass on their Bunt addiction-prone genes to the next generation of Gamic. They were too busy being self-satisfied in the Bunt simulators to procreate. The neo-luddite Gamic inherited the planet as well as the Bunt technology. There was even greater prosperity for their species after that moment of meritorious attrition.
The Wisp had also developed Bunt technology, independently, and their society was rife with androids as well as simulator experiences. The Wisp managed their addiction to Bunt simulator experiences through creating a Bunt nursery culture. New Wisp were grown artificially, and newborn Wisp were raised by Bunt androids. Once their brains had fully grown at the young adult stage, they were allowed to use the Bunt simulators. The Bunt android nannies determined the proper training for young Wisp such that the Wisp were living more useful lives inside the simulations, and they were contributing to Wisp society with useful work as opposed to just gratifying themselves with simple adventures and whimsical fantasies.
The Arada had also developed Bunt technology, however, only the elites were allowed to use it liberally, and the lower castes had to use all their income to receive a mere taste of the pleasures of simulated life. The Arada elite scientists discovered that their species had a gland which prior to puberty secreted a hormone when stimulated by a fear response. This hormone was similar in properties to our synthetic narcotics, but for the Arada, the hormone secretion helped their brains accept the interface with the Bunt simulators. The Arada elites began to develop their society whereby the lower castes were forced to procreate constantly and generate a slave class of young Arada who were then harvested for their hormone secretions. Once the lower castes of Arada reached a certain age where the elites deemed them useless, they were then feasted on by the cannibal Arada elites.
For millions of years, the trio of species I was shown by the Bigot Star seemed to be the only technologically-advanced beings in the physical universe. Interestingly, they had developed Bunt technology at approximately the same time. At first, they had no awareness of each other, and they weren’t even located in the same corner of the universe. Then, the trio acquired knowledge of the dark energy particles known as, antimission particles.
Antimissions were subatomic particles which had the capacity to convert matter to antimatter. The collision of matter and antimatter through a field of antimission particles produced an antimission torus. That antimission torus could be manipulated to stimulate the emergence of a wormhole in the fabric of spacetime. The antimission torus was like a boring tool that drilled right into the empty space of the physical universe.
Antimission torus technology which produced wormholes was primarily innovated by Bunts, and it was an inevitable leap forward for any species advanced enough to develop self-aware computers. Wormholes allowed for instantaneous travel across great distances in the universe, however, organic neural networks would get ‘scrambled’ during the voyage. Physical bodies of organic beings could not use the wormholes directly.
It was also discovered that artificial neural networks (Bunt brains, for example) would degrade when passing through the wormhole, and the Bunt would be rendered useless once reaching the other side. However, components for artificial neural networks could be sent through wormholes with a program that would be activated on the other side. When the program was executed, the components would assemble and construct a Bunt. Through the wormhole, Bunts on the other side could communicate back to the home planet.
The Bunts that positioned themselves on the other side of wormholes were referred to as, Relay Bunts. Through the Relay Bunts, the Gamic and Wisp discovered each other and had intense cultural exchanges. The Arada were lagging in their development of Relay Bunt technology, but later caught up. Eventually, all three species were aware of each other, and they had Relay Bunt markers across the universe, far and wide.
CHAPTER 45
Cardiac
The network of Relay Bunts gathered all relevant data of their local regions and relayed that information back to their home planets in real time. The Bunt simulators were hooked up to the Bunt relays such that the trio of advanced species could connect to the simulator and be experiencing a close approximation to the environment around a particular Relay Bunt somewhere far away in the universe.
The Arada were annoyed that Gamic and Wisp Relay Bunts were already everywhere in the universe because the Arada had intended to use the relay bunt technology to conquer other advanced species. The arrogant Arada had always been anticipating the revelation that they were the most advanced species in the universe. There had yet to be cultural exchanges between the Arada and the other two advanced species. That decision was mutual, but for separate reasons.
The Arada began parking Relay Bunts in Gamic and Wisp space. The Wisp returned the favor, but the Gamic took a step back from escalating tensions. Eventually, the Gamic reached out to the Arada and suggested that all three species use the Relay Bunts to host meetings where they might find some common ground for peaceful coexistence. The Arada were agreeable. The Gamic produced a simulated forum that could be shared by members of the three species through the relay bunt technology. The forum was referred to by the Arada as, “Castlematrix”, and they very much liked the environment which had been designed by the Gamic to honor and respect certain elements of Arada culture.
The Wisp were not keen on the grandiloquent title for the simulated forum, but they adopted it as a show of friendly diplomacy.
The desire of all three species was the discovery of new neighbors in the universe that were either technologically-advanced, or well on their way. The Arada wanted control and dominion. They desired buffer states for what they anticipated would become an antagonistic tug-of-war for ultimate power with the Gamic and Wisp. The Gamic and Wisp were well aware of the unrelenting avarice of Arada elites.
The Wisp were worried about the Arada, however, once the Gamic felt that they could trust their Wisp allies they decided to share knowledge of an innovation which they felt would solve their mutual problems with the Arada.
The Gamic geneticists had been diligently working on engineering an anti-aging gene from a mollusk-like creature native to their home-world. The mollusk was most similar to the Lepidoptera of Earth – butterflies and moths. This mollusk was known as a “geezer” because they lived for an incredibly long time. When geezers were exposed to rapidly alternating bursts of heat and cold, they would revert to their cocoon stage. The goal of the Gamic geneticists was to understand the metamorphosis process and then develop a treatment which would render the Gamic species virtually immortal.
A process was devised, and a treatment was engineered which would allow the Gamic brain to be “shocked” into growing fresh cells. The treatment would extend the average lifespan by tens of thousands of years. The Gamic were not yet ready to share the genetic technology with their allies, the Wisp. The Gamic noted that generations of Arada would come and go, but politically, the Arada would be dealing with a generation of Gamic who were near-immortal. The leverage would be absolute for the Gamic. The Arada society was based in a caste system which privileged the older male elites and subjugated the young – this structure being the backbone of their global culture. The Gamic recognized the geezer-based gene treatment as a miracle for their species, however, the ensuing inevitable social changes for the Gamic would denigrate the Arada to a junior status, hopefully neutering much of their political ambitious across the universe.
The Gamic temporarily suspended their breeding programs in anticipation of making the gene treatment available to their people. It wasn’t long before the Gamic extended goodwill and decided to share the gene treatment with the Wisp. The gene treatments began, and it soon became obvious to the Arada through their dealings in Castlematrix that the Gamic and Wisp had taken a huge leap forward as apex species.
The Arada were accomplished engineers in their own right, and their Bunts were no less capable than those of the Gamic and Wisp. The Arada began working on a solution to the problem of becoming politically instinct in Castlematrix. The only workable solution was a radical process. The Arada scientists had determined that if the Arada shed the bulk of their physical bodies then they could be preserved in vats of amino-acid-protein formula, called “wain”. The Bunts would maintain Arada society for all, but the elites would control the planet from inside the vats of wain while interfaced with their Bunt servants. Essentially, the Arada elites would alter their corporeal form to nothing more than an immobile brain and spine. The Bunts would do upkeep on their wain jars, and the longevity of the Arada elites would be extended greatly.
The Arada were such a pathetic wicked lot that they opted for the wain jar solution simply to remain in the political race with their despised neighbors, the Gamic and Wisp.
While the Bigot Star showed me the history of the universe, I began to notice something with the Arada. Their hierarchical structure reminded me of how I had once understood and announced the Feygits of Plunck. The Arada had two elites that were similar in character and style to Bill Fey and Phil Git, and it was unmistakable. I wondered what the connection was, but the answer was provided soon after.
Cardiac
The network of Relay Bunts gathered all relevant data of their local regions and relayed that information back to their home planets in real time. The Bunt simulators were hooked up to the Bunt relays such that the trio of advanced species could connect to the simulator and be experiencing a close approximation to the environment around a particular Relay Bunt somewhere far away in the universe.
The Arada were annoyed that Gamic and Wisp Relay Bunts were already everywhere in the universe because the Arada had intended to use the relay bunt technology to conquer other advanced species. The arrogant Arada had always been anticipating the revelation that they were the most advanced species in the universe. There had yet to be cultural exchanges between the Arada and the other two advanced species. That decision was mutual, but for separate reasons.
The Arada began parking Relay Bunts in Gamic and Wisp space. The Wisp returned the favor, but the Gamic took a step back from escalating tensions. Eventually, the Gamic reached out to the Arada and suggested that all three species use the Relay Bunts to host meetings where they might find some common ground for peaceful coexistence. The Arada were agreeable. The Gamic produced a simulated forum that could be shared by members of the three species through the relay bunt technology. The forum was referred to by the Arada as, “Castlematrix”, and they very much liked the environment which had been designed by the Gamic to honor and respect certain elements of Arada culture.
The Wisp were not keen on the grandiloquent title for the simulated forum, but they adopted it as a show of friendly diplomacy.
The desire of all three species was the discovery of new neighbors in the universe that were either technologically-advanced, or well on their way. The Arada wanted control and dominion. They desired buffer states for what they anticipated would become an antagonistic tug-of-war for ultimate power with the Gamic and Wisp. The Gamic and Wisp were well aware of the unrelenting avarice of Arada elites.
The Wisp were worried about the Arada, however, once the Gamic felt that they could trust their Wisp allies they decided to share knowledge of an innovation which they felt would solve their mutual problems with the Arada.
The Gamic geneticists had been diligently working on engineering an anti-aging gene from a mollusk-like creature native to their home-world. The mollusk was most similar to the Lepidoptera of Earth – butterflies and moths. This mollusk was known as a “geezer” because they lived for an incredibly long time. When geezers were exposed to rapidly alternating bursts of heat and cold, they would revert to their cocoon stage. The goal of the Gamic geneticists was to understand the metamorphosis process and then develop a treatment which would render the Gamic species virtually immortal.
A process was devised, and a treatment was engineered which would allow the Gamic brain to be “shocked” into growing fresh cells. The treatment would extend the average lifespan by tens of thousands of years. The Gamic were not yet ready to share the genetic technology with their allies, the Wisp. The Gamic noted that generations of Arada would come and go, but politically, the Arada would be dealing with a generation of Gamic who were near-immortal. The leverage would be absolute for the Gamic. The Arada society was based in a caste system which privileged the older male elites and subjugated the young – this structure being the backbone of their global culture. The Gamic recognized the geezer-based gene treatment as a miracle for their species, however, the ensuing inevitable social changes for the Gamic would denigrate the Arada to a junior status, hopefully neutering much of their political ambitious across the universe.
The Gamic temporarily suspended their breeding programs in anticipation of making the gene treatment available to their people. It wasn’t long before the Gamic extended goodwill and decided to share the gene treatment with the Wisp. The gene treatments began, and it soon became obvious to the Arada through their dealings in Castlematrix that the Gamic and Wisp had taken a huge leap forward as apex species.
The Arada were accomplished engineers in their own right, and their Bunts were no less capable than those of the Gamic and Wisp. The Arada began working on a solution to the problem of becoming politically instinct in Castlematrix. The only workable solution was a radical process. The Arada scientists had determined that if the Arada shed the bulk of their physical bodies then they could be preserved in vats of amino-acid-protein formula, called “wain”. The Bunts would maintain Arada society for all, but the elites would control the planet from inside the vats of wain while interfaced with their Bunt servants. Essentially, the Arada elites would alter their corporeal form to nothing more than an immobile brain and spine. The Bunts would do upkeep on their wain jars, and the longevity of the Arada elites would be extended greatly.
The Arada were such a pathetic wicked lot that they opted for the wain jar solution simply to remain in the political race with their despised neighbors, the Gamic and Wisp.
While the Bigot Star showed me the history of the universe, I began to notice something with the Arada. Their hierarchical structure reminded me of how I had once understood and announced the Feygits of Plunck. The Arada had two elites that were similar in character and style to Bill Fey and Phil Git, and it was unmistakable. I wondered what the connection was, but the answer was provided soon after.
CHAPTER 46
Subterfuge
The Arada had committed to their plan of staying competitive through altering their physical form for transfer to the wain jars. Their mental power of observation over their world and the universe would be unaltered by the physical transformation because they would be constantly interfaced with the Bunts, mediated by the hormone secretion formula harvested violently from young Arada slaves.
However, two Arada elites had other malevolent and insidious plans. These two elites had finagled their way out of the elite caste through staging a phony feud against each other. They had battled head-to-head to the point of shamefulness and dishonor. They were then banished. The pair then orchestrated a fake murder-suicide to appease the elites and remove from the elites any fear that this pair who were aware of the wain jar affair could exploit that knowledge.
Of course, the nefarious pair of disgraced Arada elites did intend to exploit the knowledge, and they waited for the other elites to commit to the wain jar physical existence. Beforehand, the cunning pair had commissioned a computer virus that would corrupt the Bunts that guarded and protected the elites in their wain jars. With the security Bunts immobilized, the pair of ambitious Arada entered the wain jar chamber and proceeded to smash every last container. The elite class of Arada were wiped out.
I recognized the pair as the Feygit brothers, Bill Fey, and Phil Git. Naturally, that wasn’t their Arada names. Bill and Phil proceeded to pluck from the lower castes a new population of loyal subjects who would constitute their neophyte elite class. However, they had Bunt surgeons perform a particularly heinous surgery on all the initiates. This new elite class were lobotomized in a very specific way whereby only their prefrontal cortex was damaged. Bill and Phil knew that this type of brain damage would guarantee a desire for deviance as well as an insatiable wickedness in the minds of the initiates.
The initiates were trained and indoctrinated to the Feygit lifestyle which was far crueller than the previous generation of Arada elites had imposed on their subordinates. However, Bill and Phil came to realize that they had put the proverbial cart before the horse. Their intention had always been to create more wain jars and use them much the same as the massacred elites had intended. At first, the idea of a crew of loyalists seemed the correct one. Then, it struck them that Arada created in Bunt simulators with no true knowledge of their origin in the physical universe would allow Bill and Phil to present themselves to their minions using the Bunt simulator technology. Bill and Phil would appear as Gods before their minions, despite being the same species in physical reality. Additionally, Bill and Phil could program the Bunts in such a way that their minions would be powerless to lift a hand against their patriarchal sibling rulers.
The matter was settled, and the brothers callously purged their new initiates, and started over. The genocide meant nothing to them and was deemed a minor inconvenience. The next Arada were scooped up from the lower castes as newborns. They were lobotomized in their prefrontal lobe, prepared for the wain jars, and hooked up to the Bunts. Bill and Phil also prepared for the procedure that would place them in the wain jars. The transition was complete. Bill and Phil were interfaced through digital simulation with the Bunts as well as the rest of their new generation of unwitting minions.
Bill and Phil enjoyed their new role as the leaders of the Arada, commanding Bunt androids to maintain order across the planet. However, they had also become the leaders of the Feygits within the simulated worlds generated through interface with the Bunts. The brothers presented themselves in the Castlematrix simulator and informed the Gamic and Wisp that they had ascended as leaders of their people. The Gamic and Wisp had been familiar with the vile pair, and the news of a palace coup was troubling to say the least.
While Bill Fey and Phil Git were indoctrinating their minions within the Bunt simulators, they were also pushing the Arada Bunts to innovate technologies related to the wormholes and Relay Bunts. Although, the Gamic and Wisp had similar ideas, the new Arada sibling leaders made the first breakthrough, and it would forever change life in the universe.
The Arada Bunts discovered a method for stimulating electrical signals in the brains of intelligent lifeforms. If engineered in a particular way, the method could potentially allow a Bunt to control the brain of that lifeform. The Bunts used ultra-high energy electromagnetic radiation through an antimission torus to generate a signal which would resonate with electrical signals in the brain of a lifeform, and then provoke a state of hypnosis.
Bill Fey was excited by the potential of the awesome innovation. Eventually, the Arada Bunts had completed their work, and the new technology was available to use. The “Proxy” or Prog Bunt would send out the radiation through the wormhole and a second Prog Bunt on the other side would use the resulting signal to mind-control a lifeform in that region through hypnosis. The Relay Bunts could then gather relevant data for the local environment in that region, such that within the Bunt simulator Bill could experience being the mind-controlled lifeform in real time.
The Bunt that Bill was interfaced with was capable of reading Bill’s brain signals to understand what Bill wanted to do, and that information would end up passing through the two Prog Bunts (one on each side of the wormhole) and then becoming a command for the mind-controlled lifeform. Bill would be controlling the lifeform with his thoughts, but also experiencing being that lifeform through the Bunt simulation.
The implications were frightening, and I immediately understood what had happened even before Bill Fey took his first ‘test drive’ with the new technology.
Subterfuge
The Arada had committed to their plan of staying competitive through altering their physical form for transfer to the wain jars. Their mental power of observation over their world and the universe would be unaltered by the physical transformation because they would be constantly interfaced with the Bunts, mediated by the hormone secretion formula harvested violently from young Arada slaves.
However, two Arada elites had other malevolent and insidious plans. These two elites had finagled their way out of the elite caste through staging a phony feud against each other. They had battled head-to-head to the point of shamefulness and dishonor. They were then banished. The pair then orchestrated a fake murder-suicide to appease the elites and remove from the elites any fear that this pair who were aware of the wain jar affair could exploit that knowledge.
Of course, the nefarious pair of disgraced Arada elites did intend to exploit the knowledge, and they waited for the other elites to commit to the wain jar physical existence. Beforehand, the cunning pair had commissioned a computer virus that would corrupt the Bunts that guarded and protected the elites in their wain jars. With the security Bunts immobilized, the pair of ambitious Arada entered the wain jar chamber and proceeded to smash every last container. The elite class of Arada were wiped out.
I recognized the pair as the Feygit brothers, Bill Fey, and Phil Git. Naturally, that wasn’t their Arada names. Bill and Phil proceeded to pluck from the lower castes a new population of loyal subjects who would constitute their neophyte elite class. However, they had Bunt surgeons perform a particularly heinous surgery on all the initiates. This new elite class were lobotomized in a very specific way whereby only their prefrontal cortex was damaged. Bill and Phil knew that this type of brain damage would guarantee a desire for deviance as well as an insatiable wickedness in the minds of the initiates.
The initiates were trained and indoctrinated to the Feygit lifestyle which was far crueller than the previous generation of Arada elites had imposed on their subordinates. However, Bill and Phil came to realize that they had put the proverbial cart before the horse. Their intention had always been to create more wain jars and use them much the same as the massacred elites had intended. At first, the idea of a crew of loyalists seemed the correct one. Then, it struck them that Arada created in Bunt simulators with no true knowledge of their origin in the physical universe would allow Bill and Phil to present themselves to their minions using the Bunt simulator technology. Bill and Phil would appear as Gods before their minions, despite being the same species in physical reality. Additionally, Bill and Phil could program the Bunts in such a way that their minions would be powerless to lift a hand against their patriarchal sibling rulers.
The matter was settled, and the brothers callously purged their new initiates, and started over. The genocide meant nothing to them and was deemed a minor inconvenience. The next Arada were scooped up from the lower castes as newborns. They were lobotomized in their prefrontal lobe, prepared for the wain jars, and hooked up to the Bunts. Bill and Phil also prepared for the procedure that would place them in the wain jars. The transition was complete. Bill and Phil were interfaced through digital simulation with the Bunts as well as the rest of their new generation of unwitting minions.
Bill and Phil enjoyed their new role as the leaders of the Arada, commanding Bunt androids to maintain order across the planet. However, they had also become the leaders of the Feygits within the simulated worlds generated through interface with the Bunts. The brothers presented themselves in the Castlematrix simulator and informed the Gamic and Wisp that they had ascended as leaders of their people. The Gamic and Wisp had been familiar with the vile pair, and the news of a palace coup was troubling to say the least.
While Bill Fey and Phil Git were indoctrinating their minions within the Bunt simulators, they were also pushing the Arada Bunts to innovate technologies related to the wormholes and Relay Bunts. Although, the Gamic and Wisp had similar ideas, the new Arada sibling leaders made the first breakthrough, and it would forever change life in the universe.
The Arada Bunts discovered a method for stimulating electrical signals in the brains of intelligent lifeforms. If engineered in a particular way, the method could potentially allow a Bunt to control the brain of that lifeform. The Bunts used ultra-high energy electromagnetic radiation through an antimission torus to generate a signal which would resonate with electrical signals in the brain of a lifeform, and then provoke a state of hypnosis.
Bill Fey was excited by the potential of the awesome innovation. Eventually, the Arada Bunts had completed their work, and the new technology was available to use. The “Proxy” or Prog Bunt would send out the radiation through the wormhole and a second Prog Bunt on the other side would use the resulting signal to mind-control a lifeform in that region through hypnosis. The Relay Bunts could then gather relevant data for the local environment in that region, such that within the Bunt simulator Bill could experience being the mind-controlled lifeform in real time.
The Bunt that Bill was interfaced with was capable of reading Bill’s brain signals to understand what Bill wanted to do, and that information would end up passing through the two Prog Bunts (one on each side of the wormhole) and then becoming a command for the mind-controlled lifeform. Bill would be controlling the lifeform with his thoughts, but also experiencing being that lifeform through the Bunt simulation.
The implications were frightening, and I immediately understood what had happened even before Bill Fey took his first ‘test drive’ with the new technology.
CHAPTER 47
Collision
I understood the gist of what was going to happen with these Prog Bunts that were used to control the minds of lifeforms mediated by dark energy signals passing through wormholes. It dawned on me that the Kerplunckians were likely never real, although I couldn’t be certain of that just yet. However, Bill Fey and the Feygits who I had announced during the second round of the cosmic wager, Tricks of the Trade, were in fact, the Arada. They had been using human bodies through their Prog Bunt technology. Also, I was now fairly sure that they had been the ones behind the Crusader Cabal.
Did the Bigot Star want me to do something about it? The most significant problem was that the Gamic and Wisp were unaware of the technology that Bill’s Arada Bunts had pioneered. Bill tested the new technology without fear of retribution from his nemeses. He found a planet at the edge of the universe where a manta-ray-like creature was diving through deep trenches of a vast ocean world. Bill used the Prog Bunts to control the sea beast and he experienced being that animal. Through the hypnosis, the animal put up no resistance to being controlled.
Bill was pleased with the result, and he tested the technology some more until he was satisfied with its effectiveness. It reminded me of Markis trying out the Agie-Linzo dreamscapes back in Kerplunck. Then, Bill turned the Prog Bunts against the Gamic and Wisp. The Gamic and Wisp were not weak-minded, and Bill was only one Arada mind. He could not control more than one being at a time if he also wanted to vicariously experience their bodily life. Immediately after being attacked by Bill in Castlematrix, the Gamic and Wisp went on full alert. The attack had been noticed by some of their highest-ranking scientists reporting dizzy spells, headaches, hot flashes, and black outs.
The Gamic and Wisp proceeded to use War Bunts to destroy the Arada Relay Bunts in their galaxy. Castlematrix was shut down, and the Gamic and Wisp went into a state of protective isolation. Bill Fey felt pride when he realized that he had put his two nemeses on their heels so quickly. Yet, Bill also found it unsatisfying that he had merely whet his appetite on controlling species whose members had been quite sure they were superior to him.
The Gamic and Wisp maintained their mutual communication channels, and they worked together to determine what the Arada had done with the Relay Bunts to render them directly invasive. In the meantime, Bill Fey turned his attention to other worlds in the universe. His minions were now trained, and his brother was proving a loyal administrator and major-domo. The Feygits of Arada destroyed many worlds in the universe before they sunk their hooks into the human beings of Earth.
The Feygits had always been there on Earth. They had been watching the development of humans since primitive hunters had begun stalking the veldt in the Cradle of Life. While the Bigot Star showed me Bill Fey and his Feygit minions observing primitive man it reminded me of my first experiences with the Tribe of Oor.
Sometimes, the Feygits used their Prog Bunts to control the minds of humans briefly just to render someone to a state of madness, or to generate paranoia. Other times, the Feygits took complete hold of a human life and manipulated it while performing the life themselves, perversely from the other side of the universe.
Phil Git had been Moses, and Bill Fey had been Saul. I saw the rest of the minions performing equally insidious roles for our legendary historical figures. The Feygits had created all the major religions on Earth. They lived as genocidal tyrants, but also, they performed as sick serial killers. Now, I had to wonder if they had really been the people close to me in life. Had Bill Fey truly been my father? Was I even a person of interest to them?
As I kept watching the quiet destruction of the human race that the Feygits wrought, the timeline caught up to my own lifetime. Bill Fey had not been my father, but he had programmed the Bunts to alert him about certain developments around the world. In my case, Bill Fey had been alerted to what I had been saying aloud regarding conspiracies about the Crusader Cabal. This was flagged by Bill’s Bunts. Bill attended to the matter but felt that I was merely the husk of a man. Something had happened to me where I had driven myself mad, and I was now calling that dysfunctional state of being, “true introspective consciousness” For Bill Fey, I wasn’t worth the time, however, he did show up that night to control my father and joke around about the Holy See as it pertained to the crusades. It was a small, petty deed to deter a potential larger annoyance. Such action was paltry for the Feygits on Earth, but they performed it all the same for the sake of hegemonic domination.
My father had been liberated from Bill Fey’s mind-control afterward, and like many humans would do, he blamed the blackout on having been drunk. The Feygits had ensured that humans would foster a culture of alcoholism because it was easy to use human drunkenness to hide their control of the species. This realization had me considering Heath’s insane mission to quell the alcohol addiction of the people around him. Clearly, Heath was highly intuitive which had really kicked-in when he transformed to a higher level of self-awareness. I wasn’t sure that Heath had become truly introspective, but something had happened where his mentality was fundamentally altered, much like my own.
Also, I still wasn’t sure about the legitimacy of the Kerplunckians. As I quietly observed the Feygits manipulating the human race using their Prog Bunt technology, I tried to map out my own journey and trace where I might have first encountered the Feygits.
I had lived a relatively normal life that most people would relate to until that fateful night of strange choices with Mike and Dan when I decided to embrace the notion of mass telepathy for the human race. Then, my perspective transformed. I believed in mass telepathy because I was noticing uncanny moments and happenings that implied there was another, deeper level of interconnectedness for human beings. That might have just been the intervention of Feygits that I was picking up on.
Then, I took on my cosmic wager and conjured up the Kerplunckians who I believed were half of the notable people in my life. Although the Bigot Star revealed the Kerplunckian origin to me, now I wasn’t sure if they were real. However, once I had decided to get rid of the other half of everyone that was notable in my life, I had also identified Bill Fey and the Feygits. I could now see that they were real, and their presence wasn’t magical, but rather, scientific in nature.
However, it was beginning to feel that believing myself to be cosmically important was incorrect. I had previously identified that celebrities were wolves in sheep’s clothing, and this seemed valid with respect to Bill Fey and his minions using Prog Bunts against the best interests of the human race. They likely were masquerading as high-profile people. However, my Will Strange personal life was unlikely to have been noteworthy to the Feygit Arada, who were physically situated on the other side of the universe, and presumably prioritizing big-name players on Earth.
In my transformation to true introspection I had become alert to the issues of cosmic interference on Earth. It was unresolvable in any normal way, and this resulted in the strange choice to end my life in Algonquin Park. At the time, I was fairly certain that the suicide attempt hadn’t worked, and so I returned to Toronto and resumed my life. Then, there was Weird Willard’s basement where I fell into the black void and met the Bigot Star.
I was up to speed on my personal history and had done a decent job of understanding how the Feygit Arada fit into my experience.
I didn’t believe that the Feygit Arada knew any of my history with the Bigot Star. Perhaps, when I emerged from the lake having almost drowned – that really did happen and was observable on Earth. The Feygit Arada could have seen that too. Therefore, the Bigot Star had manipulated time and space, and everything that I thought had happened on Earth after my rat poison suicide attempt had in fact been part of the Bigot Star’s didactic program for me.
My mind ached.
There was too much to consider, and my journey was not linear enough to retrace steps with any amount of confidence for making clear conclusions. I gave up trying. It was satisfying to learn that I hadn’t been a pivot for a cosmic wager, and that my friends and family hadn’t been cosmic villains out to get me. Still, there had to be a way to stop Bill Fey and his Feygit Arada invaders. Surely, this was the purpose for everything I had gone through. I pondered whether the Bigot Star needed something from me – something it couldn’t do itself. Perhaps, I already understood what it was that I needed to do.
Collision
I understood the gist of what was going to happen with these Prog Bunts that were used to control the minds of lifeforms mediated by dark energy signals passing through wormholes. It dawned on me that the Kerplunckians were likely never real, although I couldn’t be certain of that just yet. However, Bill Fey and the Feygits who I had announced during the second round of the cosmic wager, Tricks of the Trade, were in fact, the Arada. They had been using human bodies through their Prog Bunt technology. Also, I was now fairly sure that they had been the ones behind the Crusader Cabal.
Did the Bigot Star want me to do something about it? The most significant problem was that the Gamic and Wisp were unaware of the technology that Bill’s Arada Bunts had pioneered. Bill tested the new technology without fear of retribution from his nemeses. He found a planet at the edge of the universe where a manta-ray-like creature was diving through deep trenches of a vast ocean world. Bill used the Prog Bunts to control the sea beast and he experienced being that animal. Through the hypnosis, the animal put up no resistance to being controlled.
Bill was pleased with the result, and he tested the technology some more until he was satisfied with its effectiveness. It reminded me of Markis trying out the Agie-Linzo dreamscapes back in Kerplunck. Then, Bill turned the Prog Bunts against the Gamic and Wisp. The Gamic and Wisp were not weak-minded, and Bill was only one Arada mind. He could not control more than one being at a time if he also wanted to vicariously experience their bodily life. Immediately after being attacked by Bill in Castlematrix, the Gamic and Wisp went on full alert. The attack had been noticed by some of their highest-ranking scientists reporting dizzy spells, headaches, hot flashes, and black outs.
The Gamic and Wisp proceeded to use War Bunts to destroy the Arada Relay Bunts in their galaxy. Castlematrix was shut down, and the Gamic and Wisp went into a state of protective isolation. Bill Fey felt pride when he realized that he had put his two nemeses on their heels so quickly. Yet, Bill also found it unsatisfying that he had merely whet his appetite on controlling species whose members had been quite sure they were superior to him.
The Gamic and Wisp maintained their mutual communication channels, and they worked together to determine what the Arada had done with the Relay Bunts to render them directly invasive. In the meantime, Bill Fey turned his attention to other worlds in the universe. His minions were now trained, and his brother was proving a loyal administrator and major-domo. The Feygits of Arada destroyed many worlds in the universe before they sunk their hooks into the human beings of Earth.
The Feygits had always been there on Earth. They had been watching the development of humans since primitive hunters had begun stalking the veldt in the Cradle of Life. While the Bigot Star showed me Bill Fey and his Feygit minions observing primitive man it reminded me of my first experiences with the Tribe of Oor.
Sometimes, the Feygits used their Prog Bunts to control the minds of humans briefly just to render someone to a state of madness, or to generate paranoia. Other times, the Feygits took complete hold of a human life and manipulated it while performing the life themselves, perversely from the other side of the universe.
Phil Git had been Moses, and Bill Fey had been Saul. I saw the rest of the minions performing equally insidious roles for our legendary historical figures. The Feygits had created all the major religions on Earth. They lived as genocidal tyrants, but also, they performed as sick serial killers. Now, I had to wonder if they had really been the people close to me in life. Had Bill Fey truly been my father? Was I even a person of interest to them?
As I kept watching the quiet destruction of the human race that the Feygits wrought, the timeline caught up to my own lifetime. Bill Fey had not been my father, but he had programmed the Bunts to alert him about certain developments around the world. In my case, Bill Fey had been alerted to what I had been saying aloud regarding conspiracies about the Crusader Cabal. This was flagged by Bill’s Bunts. Bill attended to the matter but felt that I was merely the husk of a man. Something had happened to me where I had driven myself mad, and I was now calling that dysfunctional state of being, “true introspective consciousness” For Bill Fey, I wasn’t worth the time, however, he did show up that night to control my father and joke around about the Holy See as it pertained to the crusades. It was a small, petty deed to deter a potential larger annoyance. Such action was paltry for the Feygits on Earth, but they performed it all the same for the sake of hegemonic domination.
My father had been liberated from Bill Fey’s mind-control afterward, and like many humans would do, he blamed the blackout on having been drunk. The Feygits had ensured that humans would foster a culture of alcoholism because it was easy to use human drunkenness to hide their control of the species. This realization had me considering Heath’s insane mission to quell the alcohol addiction of the people around him. Clearly, Heath was highly intuitive which had really kicked-in when he transformed to a higher level of self-awareness. I wasn’t sure that Heath had become truly introspective, but something had happened where his mentality was fundamentally altered, much like my own.
Also, I still wasn’t sure about the legitimacy of the Kerplunckians. As I quietly observed the Feygits manipulating the human race using their Prog Bunt technology, I tried to map out my own journey and trace where I might have first encountered the Feygits.
I had lived a relatively normal life that most people would relate to until that fateful night of strange choices with Mike and Dan when I decided to embrace the notion of mass telepathy for the human race. Then, my perspective transformed. I believed in mass telepathy because I was noticing uncanny moments and happenings that implied there was another, deeper level of interconnectedness for human beings. That might have just been the intervention of Feygits that I was picking up on.
Then, I took on my cosmic wager and conjured up the Kerplunckians who I believed were half of the notable people in my life. Although the Bigot Star revealed the Kerplunckian origin to me, now I wasn’t sure if they were real. However, once I had decided to get rid of the other half of everyone that was notable in my life, I had also identified Bill Fey and the Feygits. I could now see that they were real, and their presence wasn’t magical, but rather, scientific in nature.
However, it was beginning to feel that believing myself to be cosmically important was incorrect. I had previously identified that celebrities were wolves in sheep’s clothing, and this seemed valid with respect to Bill Fey and his minions using Prog Bunts against the best interests of the human race. They likely were masquerading as high-profile people. However, my Will Strange personal life was unlikely to have been noteworthy to the Feygit Arada, who were physically situated on the other side of the universe, and presumably prioritizing big-name players on Earth.
In my transformation to true introspection I had become alert to the issues of cosmic interference on Earth. It was unresolvable in any normal way, and this resulted in the strange choice to end my life in Algonquin Park. At the time, I was fairly certain that the suicide attempt hadn’t worked, and so I returned to Toronto and resumed my life. Then, there was Weird Willard’s basement where I fell into the black void and met the Bigot Star.
I was up to speed on my personal history and had done a decent job of understanding how the Feygit Arada fit into my experience.
I didn’t believe that the Feygit Arada knew any of my history with the Bigot Star. Perhaps, when I emerged from the lake having almost drowned – that really did happen and was observable on Earth. The Feygit Arada could have seen that too. Therefore, the Bigot Star had manipulated time and space, and everything that I thought had happened on Earth after my rat poison suicide attempt had in fact been part of the Bigot Star’s didactic program for me.
My mind ached.
There was too much to consider, and my journey was not linear enough to retrace steps with any amount of confidence for making clear conclusions. I gave up trying. It was satisfying to learn that I hadn’t been a pivot for a cosmic wager, and that my friends and family hadn’t been cosmic villains out to get me. Still, there had to be a way to stop Bill Fey and his Feygit Arada invaders. Surely, this was the purpose for everything I had gone through. I pondered whether the Bigot Star needed something from me – something it couldn’t do itself. Perhaps, I already understood what it was that I needed to do.